Some Songs I Wrote In College

by Lena Sutter

/
  • Streaming + Download

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    Purchasable with gift card

      $7 USD  or more

     

1.
05:10
2.
3.
4.
01:02
5.
03:16
6.
7.
04:14
8.

credits

released October 6, 2017

Written, Performed, Recorded, and Mixed by Lena Sutter
Mastered by Mitchell Graham

Raisin Toast Records, 2017

license

Some rights reserved. Please refer to individual track pages for license info.

tags

about

Lena Sutter Ann Arbor, Michigan

Ann Arbor based musician fusing a wide range of folk, rock, and electronic influences into unique, memorable tunes.

contact / help

Contact Lena Sutter

Streaming and
Download help

Redeem code

Track Name: Topside
I pray that my toes will take root
and my limbs will grow lithesome like elm
No matter how high god hangs the moon
You'll see me kiss the horizon unfurled
'cause branches aren't bothered by the changing of leaves
but my bones weigh me down to the bed
The choices I make, they are not best for me
So I'd rather stand choiceless instead
I'd rather be topside my head

It would scream in my rings, all that I've seen
Oh I could not forgive and forget
But my cheap memory remembers clicking of Ts
but the vowels are lost in neglect
I'd rather be topside my head

I give and I give and I give
Till my ventricles are overmined pits
Only blood shot through my eyes to show for it
But I owe yeah I owe yeah I owe
More than I could ever requite
I could never make this right

There's this turquoise I've crushed to inlay in my love
So maybe someone would find it worthwhile
But heaven knows that it's dark in the folds
so the shimmer is modest and mild
I have shaped with my hands, I have shaped with my will
only one issued opaque regret
So flay off my skin and carve me a hull
A still life, a silhouette
I'd rather be topside my head

I dig and I dig and I dig
through the wires and the whispers of my pith
only blood beneath my nails to show for it
But I know yeah I know yeah I know
I'll never reach Arcadian bliss
I'll always be snared in this head

But I pray that my toes will take root

I pray, I pray every day for you to stay
Track Name: Scabs & Sashes
I am shaped from northern wind
snow's the marrow in my bones
and though I ride the southern currents
December always pulls me home

As a kid I climbed calligraphy trees
And I let them write all over me
In scars and scabs and hairline fractures
I wear them still like beauty queen sashes

Like I am still a child
playing in the park
trading secrets with my first crush like trading cards
I am still a child
knee deep in a freezing lake
no matter the path I choose to take
some part of me stays

I've been frozen, I've been scalded
I've been temperate skies of june
but brisk, crisp mornings always brought me
back to a hometown icy blue

Like I am still a child
picking flowers for my mom
but I dropped them when i slipped and fell
so I cried when I got home
I am still a child
waist deep in a freezing lake
no matter the path I choose to take
some part of me stays

I see the creatures stare me down
from cubicles with sleek grey walls
and I scream I am not one of you
but I could be soon

I am still a child
Over my head in the lake
Track Name: Midwest Clothes
God-gold grass waltzed artless and low
I stood tall in that light air
By the chalice pond that swallowed the sun
And spit out the skies so bare

There I watched with eyes auspicious green
Now they’re unhinged blue and stone.
You said the Midwest suits me best
But the south got to my bones

The mountains stretch: chipped, antique teeth
A primeval cry of praise
For a twilight glow, cactus flowers and gold
An alluring horizon haze

Lungs full up with open sky
Now I breathe your dark smoke draft
You begged, you begged, you begged come home
I gave in at last

The whole world felt mine when the blue moon rose
Those evenings my release
And when the morning dew blessed my toes
I thought I was ready to leave

Where I lived with buoyant heart
Now my chest could sink a ship
You say that it’s just of my defects
But I’ve faltered in your grip

There I was what you craved but lacked
Now we live face to face
You say that you’ve lost your faith in me
Well I’ve just lost my faith
Track Name: Nightmare
I'm sorry that you had to see me struck
by a single bolt of lightening
on the clearest day of spring
I know I was supposed to be a steady cliff
but I crumpled so weakly
made a mess of everything
I'm sorry I'm so sick
and I'm sorry I'd been weeping
I'm sorry for the hours that you should have just been sleeping
I hide behind these adjectives and similes and imagery
In hopes to dress these massive beasts
In maybe something pretty
So I will try to make this simple and clear
I know I can be a nightmare
Track Name: Limbless
My guitar against my chest
destructive interference
cancelling out these nervous shakes i get
and I’m sorry that i’m limbless
when i’m out in public
i’m sorry, I am sorry I have tried to be whole

So I wring my wrists I bite my lip
i close my eyes and handle it
the feeling that my bones can’t stand my skin
wish i was dressed in blue so i could choose
between lucid skies and two faced pools to disappear into

I’ve said you caused a cavern
but now wolves have moved in
and god they won’t stop their howlin
all i ever needed was to listen
now i cant hear nothin but them cryin at the moon

I’ve forced all that i can out
and though i purse my cursed mouth
i’m singing Lua beggin words to dig me out
and i wonder if i’ve had better friends then all these unsuspecting men who don’t know they’ve spent a decade
singing me to bed
god i gotta rest my head

I’ve said you caused a cavern
but i think it might be endless
and the echos of these wolves will go unbounded
and all i ever needed was to listen
and all i ever needed was to play
all i ever needed
and i took it away
Track Name: Honesty & Entirety
The pushing pulling bass of your heart
snare crack of your knuckles
breath a pad of whistling strings
you got my tempo doubled

Cuz the sound of you alone
forgives my sins
breaks my bones
an apocalyptic birth to everything i’d ever know
I’m torn clean through and reassembled opalescent
feeling deeper than hell and higher than heaven

Endless shades and shimmers of your lips
sublime strokes of your hair
sculpted for the streets of Rome I’m sure
no i cannot help but stare

The outright art of you
cuts my teeth
sets me loose
a crux from which to fall
but for a moment i thought I flew
when i touch ground i’ll climb again
the thrill is progression
deeper than hell and higher than heaven

Oh i think that we’d be good together
i don’t think tryin would be too hard
with all the keys i sing in for you
one must unlock your heart

The twisting turning plot line of your eyes
alliteration in your lips
cathartic lexis of your thought
i novel i hope never ends

Words you share with me
are honesty and entirety
the spaces in between are god forsaken dry and empty
onyx space between the stars
but without void the shine is nonexistant
deeper than hell and higher than heaven
Track Name: Arroyo
In the belly of December night
with mountain edges dusted white
the valley echoed soft and low
the echoes of the bitter cold
On a piñon tree we hung all our clothes
The arroyo both beckoned and begged us to go
A glimmering ribbon, a threatening rope
But you warmed me like sweet wood smoke

We plunged, plunged on in

Beneath the surface I met you again
Like the first time It stole every breath
Pins and needles filled my lungs
made a break for the bank and started to run
My eyelashes froze into sleek silver leaves
The snow it fell so heavy on me
but oh to love so restlessly
In the cold beneath a piñon tree

We plunged, plunged on in

My fingertips were cigarettes
All red and raw
An ice blue kiss, my frosty lips
your quivering jaw
But your night time gaze it gave me shape
and the winter paused
for my heart ablaze like ghost ranch days
in the desert sun

When I'm warm and dry in summer
That haunting chill still finds me sweet
but time it just keeps wandering
Like the arroyo through the trees
I knew too soon we would split
muddy delta would remain
We could go on wandering our quiet isolated ways

Maybe someday in the ocean
two desperate mouths will meet again
and we can stop our wandering
and just drift along instead
Track Name: A Chapter Told
The sunset bathes me in nostalgia
For drooping–eyelids, droning daze
Construction paper trees outside my window
Have kept me kindled in their gaze
Juniper gin my radiator
For all those april porch light talks
Now August’s awful scorch is fading
And i’m hooked on hangover huron walks

Trespassed dark and basement bars
Frozen fights and abstract art
Lake drives, the fourth of july
Twist top wine goin caffeine blind
Climb a tree and praise jack white
Concrete feet on fire escape nights

I’ve had my messed up muddy, mad
And well, Will, I’m still sorry
A couple of things coulda turned out pretty bad
But im blessed by crust punk banjo matrimony

And moleskine books with lukewarm hooks
Lipstick lingered from library looks
Bangs ablaze, the shit we sang
Sundress dreams and sweater schemes
Mingle with the memories
That i pray i pray i make stay

Wait

A chapter told in strangest settings
Attics parking lots and pits
And all these sounds that i could not imagine
Now my purest bliss

If you like Lena Sutter, you may also like: